Silver Year November 23, 2009

I’m turning twenty five on November 30 (Monday). I’ve been feeling under the weather lately and I could not identify the source of it. It’s my silver year and i felt that I’m still the same old, boring Ana every year. Same old complaints, same old recycled stories from childhood, same old obsession with make up and skin care, same old long straight hair and same old casual outfits. I don’t know if its a good thing when elementary classmates tell me that i haven’t change a bit since kindergarten, I don’t know if I should take it as a compliment or take it as a mockery.Just a few days before turning twenty five, I want something to change, I want to get a makeover. Maybe dye my hair red with streaks of green and wear nose rings just to get out of the goody-two shoes Ana archetype.

My earlier sentences reflect unhappiness, when in fact I should be really happy and contented with what I have now. This got me thinking of the old cliche that I’m my worst critic. Well maybe Iam, and there are actually people who can appreciate me, and think of me as witty,smart and beautiful so I should drop the sour grapes and move on towards a more meaningful existence.

Before I turn 25, I want to make a strict resolution. Things in my life can do with better changes like the following:

• Break routines – Try something new each day even as simple as changing walking routes, or changing yogurt brands.
• Be fearless – this does not involve getting a fat tarantula for a pet, but rather express myself. If someone can freely express how they feel, and so can I and I expect that person to graciously accept my opinions, as graciously as I accept theirs.
• Get out more often – Youth is as ephemeral as a beautiful rose, I want to travel as much as I can and take beautiful pictures of my trips. I have to go places at least once every two months.
• Be healthy – I really should cut down on french fries and cheetos crunchy jalapeno. I should choose more healthy snacks like granola bars, unsweetened pineapple juice and more fruits and vegetables.
• gradually change wardrobe – lately i’ve been letting myself go, wearing the same old ballet flats every single day. I should have an assortment of shoes to choose from and a wide range of wardrobe.
• Blog more often – I should really make a commitment in writing at least one entry every week.
• No more insecurities – i should stop comparing waistlines with thin models and stop looking at poreless models in big billboards. They are all too good to be true.

I hope I can stick to these resolutions because some of it are too “Utopian” for me. All I’m really hoping for is happiness and peace, which are too simple for words but too difficult to have.

I hope that when the clock struck 12 on the 30th, my life would have a 360 degrees turn towards contentment and peace.

 

Romanticizing the romantic November 6, 2009

After college graduation I want to continue busting my brains with literary theories and novels and continue being a literary and cultural critique. But, eversince I started working, I slowly veer away from the sublime analysis and start to lean towards light romantic comedies, and love songs about finding way back into love.

Writing a hundred plus pages of user manual is no easy task, it feels like writing a highly technical novel about the lives of astronauts complete with mathematical equation, which are so complicated it makes your nose bleed and your brain throb.  Reading literary theories and technical writing is a fatal combination, so I advice never to do them concurrently.To de-stress myself from all the sublimity involved with my work and the nagging feeling thats compelling me to go back to Longinus and Plato, i resort to feel good love stories. Nothing profound just straight to the point boy meets girl, kissing and then falling in love in the end. Though love stories have a very predictable plot, I enjoyed watching them because I can guess what the ending will be, it sort of makes me feel in control.

Just this week, i get to contemplate on the lyrics of Taylor Swift’s love story and I realize that it is indeed a love story between Romeo and Juliet. I got so addicted that I looped this song the whole day. I felt like Juliet meeting my Romeo at the garden, in a cold night filled with twinkling stars as he recites the line ” Marry me Juliet, you’ll never have to be alone I love you and thats all I really know.” And then, I was slapped back to reality by an instant message from my teamate, saying that the program bug has been fixed.

Lately engagement news has been springing here, there and everywhere. My friends have all their pictures in facebook, their fingers clad with an expensive engagement rings and they all have big smiles on their faces. Even, Blake Lively and Penn Badgely are alleged to be engaged, though they only started their relationship in late 2007. I got a little envy every now and then, but I know this is not the proper time for me, I have yet to grow up, emotionally and spiritually. I guess I’m romanticizing too much on engagements, I think i may be saturated with too much romance.

Looking at my earlier statements, I sounded like an uber cheesy teen daydreaming about wedding gowns and happily ever afters, I can easily replace anyone from the romantic triumvirates.  Never in my twenty fours have I paid too much attention to love, engagements and romanticism. Does passion really starts to build up in quarter life? or I’m just being overly sappy?

Whatever made me feel this, if this is just because of hormones, quarter life crisis or just being plain envious, I know this will pass. I just hope it shall pass sooner.

Of Globe Broadband and High blood pressure! October 30, 2009

Since my hasty iPod Touch purchase, I became insatiable  with my Smart Bro wireless connection, because usually it takes me two days to download two movies. My boyfriend has a Globe Broadband connection which boasts of 1mbps (data only), so I was enticed to switch to Globe because he can download movies in as fast as two- four hours. Applying for internet connection was easy, fortunately for me they have a booth set up near our house. Since their are a lot of internet providersin the market,  internet providers are selling their internet services just like a barbecue on a side walk.

The internet was installed after seven days, plus one for their 5-7 days installation claim. I was really enjoying  the speed of my internet connection, I can download four movies in four hours. However, four days after the installation, the internet connection acted up. My connection is comparable to a jack in the box,popping and hiding, popping and hiding.

I called their customer service number and instead of feeling appeased, i felt more enraged because of the following reasons:

• The welcome voice is really annoying – just a personal preference hahaha.
• Promotions of new products comes first before the actual menu – as if! they’re site is often down!
• Too many numbers to choose from, they can limit their call menus to three- menu for broadband, cellphone, landline subscribers. then another menu for their promos, another menu for luzon and metro manila subscribers,another menu for billing, technical reasons.
• Annoying commercial loop before you can actually talk to their customer service representative.
• Customer service representatives are nice, but they don’t really provide useful information.

Everytime I call up the service center of Globe, they always say their ever dependable bluff that they are undergoing system restoration. How many system restoration do they need to do every year? I’m not paying 995 every month just to hear the crammy excuse that their is a system restoration.

So two weeks after the installation, I decided to just cut my subscription and pay the termination fee of Php 2000. I hope Globe reads all the rants about their internet service before they ran out of customers. I really regret cutting my Smart Bro subscription for Globe, At least with Smart Bro, I may not have the speed that I want but the stability of the connection is pretty dependable.

Oh and did I mention I’m really pissed at Globe Broadband?

Halloween October 29, 2009

I was walking to the jeepney terminal this morning when I saw  the streetsdecorated with paper maches of ghost, pumpkins and skeletons. I was confused, as to why they have to put up a lot of Halloween decorations this early and then I realize it is October 29, its almost time for trick or treats and late night horror movie marathon.

When I was a kid, the concept of trick or treat and halloween costumes can only be seen on american movies and sitcoms. A fancy halloween celebration is my most coveted dream, I imagine myself looking like Morticia Adams, pale white skin and an octopus black gown. My dream remained a dream until now, I never experienced dressing up as a creature of the dark.  Though, nothing can really compare to the old fashioned Filipino Halloween.

I remember getting excited when October nears because of the three week long semestral break. Aside from that, me and my five brothers always turns on the TV and watch local and foreign shows about real life ghost experiences, which gave me sleepless nights and made me too paranoid to close my eyes. I could not understand my fascination with cemeteries back then, maybe because I believed that the cemetery is the most haunted place and anytime something paranormal will appear.The highlight of our HAlloween is watching the horror special of Magandang Gabi Bayan(MGB), which never fails to scare me. I remember after wathching MGB, i could not go to the toilet alone, so i have to ask my mom to go with me.

I miss those times when I scare myself. Now, I don’t dare watch horror movies specially if the topic is about demonic possession. I rarely go to the cemetery because my mother opted to stay at home and just pray for our beloved relatives who died.  Things really do change as you get older, though I plan to revive my frivolousness this weekend by wearing a halloween costume that will scare my nieces and nephews mwahahahahaha.

The Body Shop Sale October 29, 2009

The Body Shop held a buy 1 take 1 sale last October 26, Monday. When you buy one item from their top twenty products, you get another product for free. It was the perfect opportunity  to stack up on my vitamin c beauty loot because I’m running out of vitamin c Intensive night cream and skin boost.

However, the night cream, is not included in their top twenty products so I opted to buy the Vitamin C Time Release Capsule, which costs Php 1,295 for twenty eight capsules. These little capsules instantly brightens up my skin till the next morning and another surprising effect is that it speeds up pimple healing.

I got the Vitamin C skin boost, another must have,as the take 1. This 30 ml serum cost 1,100 and I got it for free!!!!

 

 Two products for the price of one. I saved Php1000. I’ll definitely watch out for another Body Shop sale.

La Luz Escapade October 26, 2009

Before I start writing my La Luz experience, I want to share the annoying habit that I developed three days prior to our beach trip. Come Wednesday afternoon I was already excited with our trip on Saturday afternoon. However, I was worried that the foreboding typhoon will eventually ruin our carefully planned trip. I always craned my neck to the left and look out of the window to see if the sun is still there, and I always check the weather bug website to see if there are any changes to their seven day weather prediction. As if craning my neck and checking the weather forecast would stop the typhoon from making a landfall. Saturday morning came and I was awaken by the warm sun kissing my cheeks and the cheerful, chirping birds perched on the tree.

Moving on to my main topic, Norbert and I head to the San Juan jeepney terminal at nine in the morning. The fare from Lipa to San Juan is 53 pesos. I never expected the long ride, I thought that San Juan is a mere thirty minutes away from Lipa, after all its still in Batangas. After one hour we reached the public market and rode another jeepney going to Barangay Hugom. The road trip to Barangay Hugom took one hour, but I never got bored because I enjoyed looking at the sceneries, its nothing spectacular, just the usual rural setting, carabaos resting under the mango tree, simple bungalow houses, people sitting in front of sari sari stores talking about something.

When we got to La Luz Resort, we went to the information booth to register and the staffs were super friendly, they gave us small plastic cups of red gulaman. Check in time is 1pm, but since there are available rooms they let us check in immediately, and its only 10:30 am. The room is simple, two single beds, a huge mirror between the separate toilet and bath. There is no TV, but its ok I can live without tv for 24 hours.

Lunch buffet was served at 11 am, the food was delicious, but I never bothered taking a picture because I want to devour it right away. The selections were:

• Beef stew – the beef is tender and its the right mix of sweet and spicy
• Roasted Chicken – I still prefer the good old Andoks over this
• Chopsuey- vegetables are sweet and crunchy, though i didnt get the chance to get a quail egg, it was like hunting for easter eggs.
• Steamed fish – I’m not a big fish fan, but i think its good based on Norbert’s taste

For dessert, we ate green candied mangoes and watermelon. I love the candied green mangoes, a perfect balance between sweet and sour.  After eating, I headed back in the room for siesta and when I woke up at 3, merienda was served. The merienda menu were tuna sandwich and pansit bihon.

The buffet dinner was served by 7pm and the food is indescribably delicious! and the ambiance is breathtaking, candle lit tables amidst the dark night and the cool sea breeze blowing through my hair, I don’t want the night to end. The selections were:

• pork in gravy sauce
• oriental chicken
• fish fillet with tartar sauce
• my favorite, spring rolls with salsa!

Again, I did not took any picture because I was so busy devouring my food.

After dinner, we hang out by the cabana while patting our full stomach, the cool sea breeze making me feel sleepy.

The next day, We got up early to take pictures of the sunrise and then we finished our La Luz trip with a hearty breakfast buffet which consists of:

• daing na bangus
• egg omelet with lots of tomatoes
• longganissa
• black batangas coffee

I really enjoyed our weekend trip at La Luz, it was so serene and bucolic that going back to the city makes me feel sad. I will definitely  go back there and stay longer.

Fantabulous Friday October 23, 2009

Finally, its the last day of work week and my brain finds it hard to focus on doing some proofreading and editing. The urge to browse through different sites appeals more to me than looking at long, kilometric user manuals and editing them. I could not resist the attractive lure of weekend anticipation.

There is something about Friday, the chirping of the birds in the morning seemed louder than usual, the sun shines at its brightest making the green plants look almost luminous, balmy nights seemed refreshing that I could almost smell the scent of grapefruit and pineapples.

I mostly spend Friday nights in a provincial bus with my boyfriend, pigging out on a big pack of Clover cheese and Fit and Right blue berry. Afterwards, we will hold hands and sleep till we reached the town of Tanauan.

Nothing really special happens during my Fridays, but I really feel at peace and laid back. Friday is my perfect day, I can barely recall feeling bad on a Friday.

Happy Weekend!

October 22, 2009

Let me start my first post by answering the question” What does it feel like to be the youngest and the only girl (unica hija) in the family?”

Being the only girl in the family makes me feel special. I always get what I want, all I have to do is ask.I feel protected, I have five personal bodyguards any way. Though there are times that I feel that I’m tied down in a leash. My mother imposed a strict 6′oclock curfew, she said that i should be home before dark. I tried going home at 6:30, just thirty minutes late for my curfew and my mother never talked to me for two days. Because of this strict upbringing, I still unconsciously follow the “go home before dark curfew.”

I feel that I am way behind fashion because back then I thought that loose shirts, pants and rubbershoes are the fashion staples that every person should abide too, regardless of their gender. I feel uncomfortable wearing skirts and baby tees because my brothers always tease me about being a lady and I feel too embarassed, so for 16 years i grew up with a limited black colored wardrobe. It was only until I went to college that I met my fashionable, curly bestfriend that I was introduced to the colorful world of strappy sandals, pink make up and cute blouses.

I remember when I was 17, I attempted to wear a sleeveless top that hug the curves of my body, but I haven’t set foot outside my bedroom when my brothers gave a disapproving look and told me to change my top. They never gave up until i changed into a shapeless, white t shirt. Until now, they always tell me not to wear attention grabbing clothes because it could be the source of sin for the men who could see it, and it may put my life in danger. Even though my kuyas seemed paranoid and strict, I love them when they tell me these things, because it only shows that they still care for me eventhough they have their own families. They always tell me that I am their baby until the age of 40. How sweet of them, that’s why I find it hard to grow up!

Growing up I had my fair share of suitors, but I never informed my mother and my brothers about these suitors. I remembered when I was twelve years old, my batchmates in school knows that a particular guy is my suitor. During that time, my brother is our (the guy and me) computer teacher in school. What my brother did is to tell the guy off to stop calling me every night,and that we are both too young to be in a relationship and that we should concentrate in our studies first. Of course, during that time, I was highly infatuated with they guy, so when I learned what my brother did I got mad. After this incident, I never bothered to tell my family about my suitors.

I now have a long time boyfriend (Norbert) that they all approved of. But i will always remember how nervous I am when I was about to introduce him in the family. He was still my suitor back then and he really insisted that he visits me in the house. I warned him about my brothers, but he never faltered he told me that his intentions are clean. By the way, our panganay (eldest brother) was his professor back in college. We were having breakfast then, and I just drop the news casually, “Some one’s visiting me later and I want you all to meet him.” To my surprise, they just say OK and asked me what time will the guy come over.

My brother, sister in law and my talkative nephew were really excited to “examine” my new suitor and while they were all excited, i feel so nervous that I want to puke. When he arrived, everything goes smoothly my brother asked some usual questions about his family background, his college degree and his job and my talkative nephew just keep on teasing us.

Being an unicahija gives me mixed feelings,happy, frustrated, sad, but mostly happy and I would always be the proud bearer of this title.